HANDLING THE UNEXPECTED DEATH OF A LOVED ONE FINANCIALLY
This past six months has been tough for my family. My father fell ill in October and was hospitalized repeatedly for many different illnesses related to his final diagnosis of Non Hodgkins Lymphoma. My father had been diagnosed with Non Hodgkins Lymphoma when I was about 12 years old. His cancer had been in remission for many years, prior to his diagnosis once again this past year. We were blessed to have many more years with my father after the initial diagnosis yet we are all still so saddened by his death.During his repeated hospitalizations and the months leading up to his death my father had many health challenges with which he fought bravely. He was never going to give up and allow the cancer to win and I am very proud of his bravery in all of this. My father passed away just this past Friday at the age of 69 after 6 very difficult months of illness. Since his passing my family has learned a lot of Important things about handling an unexpected loss of a loved one and also about the best ways to plan ahead for the end of life. My father was obviously not expecting to become ill again in October and had not put into place some very important things for end of life. My father is not alone with this and many have not thought about or begun to prepare for the end of life. This is why I felt these things are so important to address and why I wanted to provide others with some resources we discovered.
What you need to prepare for before it's too late
In a previous post I addressed a few things that are extremely important to do before you or your loved one should find yourselves ill. You can check out my post here where I share why I believe we need to create a will, living will, etc to speak for us in the event that we ever become unable to speak for ourselves.
Another extremely important aspect involves discussions that may be incredibly difficult with your loved one about your desires once you are gone. Cremation versus burial? Do you want specific things for your funeral? Making decisions on how to pay for the costs involved is something many do not do well in advance. Having either savings set aside exclusively for these costs or life insurance that can be used to pay for funeral costs can be so important.
I know that my father is not alone in the fact that these things were not prepared in advance. Many people do not prepare ahead of time whether they meant to later on or just never even considered the need to do so is often unclear. My father was a smart man and I believe that he honestly just did not feel the urgency because he did not feel the end was near. I believe if he had known and had the means to do so that he would done this in advance for his family. My family has been incredibly blessed during this experience that my father's brothers stepped in to help out financially. When you are not as lucky to have loved ones who can assist financially what can you do?
What to do when you cannot afford the costs when a loved one dies unexpectedly
Was your loved on a Veteran? There are some benefits to veterans offered by the VA to assist with the costs of burial. You can find more details here on how you can obtain more information on these benefits offered.
Do you know what your loved one wanted? Cremation? Burial? These two options vary greatly in costs and the cost of cremation is far cheaper than that of a burial. Did you know that some people really do donate their bodies to science ? This can be a very cost effective thing due to the fact that the charges related to burial are then handled by the medical institution that accepts the body. If your loved one was a victim of a crime or accident you may qualify for some help. You can read more about that here.
depending on the age of your loved one social security does offer a death benefit as well to help cover the cost of burial. A spouse living in the same house can qualify for a one time lump sum death benefit of $255 & can also apply for survivor benefits.
Finally know your rights as a consumer and do not be taken advantage of by funeral home sales people. Yes, they are sales people and they make their living off of selling you specific goods and services related to funerals. If you are not careful the costs of funerals can become excessive and can really cause hardship for some families. While I definitely think planning in advance for the costs associated is always the best option, I also recognize that this is not always possible.
You may qualify for possible state assistance with the associated costs. Check here for more information on your state and what they may offer for those in need.
You can ask family members for help with the costs of the burial. If possible maybe the burden can be split by multiple family members rather than covered by only you. If this is not possible or no family is willing to help cover the costs then some of the other options listed here might be a better option for you.
These are just a few things that my family discovered through the process of arranging my father's funeral. I wanted to pass along what we have learned in hopes that I could help someone else who may also be hurting. If you have lost a loved one I know how difficult this time can be and I hope that you can handle the financial aspects as quickly and painlessly as possible. The most important aspect after the financial aspect it the grieving and healing of you and the other loved ones involved and I hope that this can quickly become your priority once the tough decisions have been made. If you have any questions or suggestions for my readers please feel free to comment below or email me at SavingJoyfully@outlook.com
